One Wednesday evening, everything grinds to a halt: your child fidgets, the comb snags, there are tears, and you tie it all up in a hurry. You wonder whether you are damaging their hair. The real question lies elsewhere.
Most of the time, you aren't. What gets stuck is not a lack of skill, it is the order of the steps, and that order can be learned. What follows covers what to observe before choosing a product, how to go about detangling that doesn't hurt, what washing and conditioning call for, which styles hold without pulling, and how to protect the hair at night. Our step-by-step tutorial sets out the six steps of the Rituel Texture®, which are the same for a child as for an adult.
Point 1The right word, and the right texture
When I arrived in mainland France, I was the only girl in my class with coily hair. My mother kept doing my hair with care, so that I went to school well groomed and felt good about myself. Doing your daughter's hair is a way of passing something on.
Ghana Elin, founder
First, a word, because it comes up in almost all your questions. "Mixed race" says something about your child and their story, and it is often the word you use when you look for help. Yet it describes no texture: there is no such thing as mixed-race hair. What you have under your fingers is coily hair, curly hair, often both on the same head, and that is what dictates the steps. Our article on the difference between coily and curly hair helps put words to this.
Everything else follows from there. No heritage determines a texture: among siblings, one may have wavy hair and another distinctly coily hair, and it can change again around the age of six or seven. That explains why advice from one side of the family or the other sometimes misses the mark: it describes a different kind of hair.
Three observations are enough to shape a routine. The size of the curl, which tells you how prone the hair is to tangling. How fast it dries: hair that dries in a few minutes loses water as quickly as it absorbs it. And finally the distribution, because several textures almost always live on the same head, the nape tighter than the temples; you then adapt your technique section by section. Our article on coily hair types explains these markers in detail, without turning them into a fixed label.
Point 2Detangling, the step that decides it all
This is the step that gives styling textured hair its reputation, and the one surrounded by the most misunderstandings. You often read that you should never detangle dry. That isn't what we teach. The Rituel Texture® actually opens with Chadian finger detangling, using the fingers, on dry hair, before bath time. What causes breakage isn't dry hair: it is a comb run through dry hair with no product on it.
With a child, this rule counts twice over. A comb that forces just once is enough to create an apprehension that lasts for years, and a child who dreads the session wriggles, which increases the pulling. So the comb only comes in at one moment, later on, on hair coated in mask.
The mechanics are simple. Divide the hair into at least six sections, eight if it is very dense or very tangled, and clip away the ones you aren't working on. Hold the root with one hand so the pulling never reaches the scalp. Work out the knots from ends to roots, one small section at a time, separating rather than pulling.
If your child complains, if a knot won't give, or if you see hair snapping in your hands, put the comb down: fingers only. That is the rule we give the hairdressers we train. Our method for pain-free detangling goes through the steps one by one.
Point 3Washing and conditioning
The rhythm is the same as for an adult: a full Rituel Texture® every seven to ten days. Washing more often strips away sebum that this texture already struggles to carry down the length of the fibre.
Cleansing happens in two stages, a gentle clarifying cleanse and then Le Shampoing Réparateur, our sulfate-free shampoo, massaged into the scalp with the fingertips. The lengths are cleaned by the water running down: rubbing them achieves nothing and tangles what you have just detangled.
Next comes Le Masque Réparateur, left on for ten minutes on towel-dried hair, under a shower cap if your child will accept one. Ten minutes is enough, and the time is not stretched to a whole night because the hair is dry. It is during this time that the fibre becomes slippery enough to take the comb: Le Peigne de Man Dol', with its wide teeth, then goes from ends to roots, without forcing, switching back to fingers as soon as there is resistance.
The full routine ends with La Crème Coiffante, applied to damp hair, which helps hold on to the moisture from the wash and prepares the hair for styling. The same products suit children and adults alike, as long as they are sulfate-free and free of harsh fragrance.
Point 4Protective styles
Braids, twists, cornrows and buns share the same advantage: they cut down on daily handling, and so on chances for breakage. They can be decorated, and many children love them for exactly that reason: for choosing the beads as much as for the style itself.
As for how long to keep them in, be wary of ready-made numbers. With a child, three signs tell you when it is time to take the style out, and none of them appears on a calendar: the base starting to mat, regrowth forming tight knots, and your child saying it itches. The weight of extensions and the tension of the install simply bring that moment forward. Don't go straight from one style to the next either: a few days without a style give the scalp time to recover.
The most important point fits in one sentence: a style should never hurt. Repeated tension on the hairline is the recognised mechanism behind traction alopecia, described in girls and women who regularly wear braids, cornrows and weaves (Khumalo et al., Journal of the American Academy of Dermatology, 2008). Caught early, it can be reversed. Once established, it leaves a thinned hairline that does not always grow back.
When to ask a doctor or dermatologist
- Patches, crusts, spots with pus, or weeping areas.
- Thinning areas appear, especially at the temples or along the hairline.
- Hair snaps off close to the scalp in one specific area.
- Your child complains of pain or itching that doesn't go away.
These signs call for medical advice, not a change of routine.
Point 5Night-time
A night without protection undoes part of the previous day's work and makes the next morning's detangling longer. For an adult, our recommendation is a silk scarf with a silk pillowcase. For a child, the order is reversed: the pillowcase comes first, because it protects all night long without depending on what stays on their head until morning. The scarf comes second, if your child will wear it.
Before bed, take out the day's style, add a little more Crème Coiffante, focusing on the ends, and redo some loose plaits, twisted on themselves and never tight at the root. The comb is only useful if the hair is really tangled. Our night-time styles work just as well on children as on adults.
Point 6Making hair time a shared moment
A child who dreads having their hair done ends up dreading their hair. That is why we work faster with the youngest ones in the salon, even if it means a simpler style, and why we show them each step as we go: a child who understands what you are doing waits more patiently for the end, and will learn to do it themselves.
Announce the session in advance rather than springing it on them, and split it in two if it drags on. Let your child choose their accessories, and set up a regular appointment. Finally, choose styles they feel comfortable in at school: that is where they will wear their hair all day. A few books help put words to what they see in the mirror, especially if they are the only one in their class with this texture.
Not sure where to start with their hair?
Our experts go through the routine with you online, starting from what you see on your child's head. For a damaged, painful or thinning scalp, a doctor's advice comes first.
Book a consultationFrequently asked questions
How can I tell what my child's hair texture is?
At what age should a proper routine start?
Should I detangle on dry or damp hair?
Can adult products be used on a child?
What if my child refuses to have their hair done?
Further reading
Sources
- Khumalo N. P. et al., "Determinants of marginal traction alopecia in African girls and women", Journal of the American Academy of Dermatology, 2008.
